How Much Sex Does a Healthy (and Happy) Relationship Need?

Once a week. That’s how often a couple needs to have sex to derive the maximum ‘happiness’ benefits this activity can offer. And yet, George Loewenstein, a professor at Carnegie Mellon University and author of one of the studies that came to this conclusion calls the study itself “misguided”. So, what is a true answer to the question that interests so many?

It turns out that there isn’t a clear-cut answer. However, that ‘once a week’ conclusion is the accepted standard. The reasons behind that answer, however, might be very surprising to some.

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Why Does Having Sex Once a Week Make You Happy?

That answer is simple, it’s because having sex makes you happy by default. That’s directly connected to the release of endorphins as well as your improved wellbeing associated with the activity.

As to the frequency, there have been many studies on this subject, says The Time. And they mostly concluded that having sex one time a week is enough to be as happy as you can be from sex alone.

That, there is a very important detail. While couples that had sex less frequently were generally less happy, those who did it more often, weren’t happier. Therefore, the number of times itself doesn’t seem to matter, as long as you don’t go below that ‘once a week’ minimum. However, increasing the frequency won’t be a magical ‘fix all’ for a relationship.

What If I Don’t Get That ‘Once a Week’ Quota?

When you are in a relationship, especially a long-term one, some drop in sexual drive is to be expected. It’s a natural process as the excitement of sex fades the more often you have it. It might even come to a point where seeing your partner naked won’t arouse you anymore.

If this is what’s happening to you, there are two essential steps to take:

  1. Find out if the problem is physiological.
  2. Diversify your sex life while dealing with Step 1.

You’ll need to do the first in order to understand whether the reason is medical and require treatment. For example, over 100 million men on the planet suffer from some form of erectile dysfunction. In the majority of cases, this condition can be treated or at least managed to allow you to have a healthy sex life.

Non-severe cases don’t even need medical treatment as some natural supplements and superfoods, like oysters, can be enough. Products like Erexa tropin contains epimedium sagittatum and maca powder, both natural aphrodisiacs. They help improve the quality and length of erections as they facilitate blood flow to the penis and assist with treating the causes of the dysfunction, such as low tone or partial obstruction of your blood vessels.

Female sexual arousal disorders, unfortunately, are poorly studied. Therefore, natural supplements that can boost ladies’ libido remain unknown. Maca powder is believed to have a beneficial effect on both men and women. However, no conclusive studies are available at the moment.

While looking into possible physiological causes of your infrequent intercourse, you shouldn’t forget about the psychological side of things. The simple truth here is that the attraction between long-term partners fades with time. This doesn’t mean that your love grows weaker. It’s a natural and unavoidable change.

Therefore, you need to be proactive in spurring that desire on.

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How to Keep the Sexual Fire Burning in a Long-Term Relationship

In the majority of cases, a bit of experimentation, originality, and, surprisingly, scheduling, can be enough to keep a healthy sexual relationship with one partner for many years to come. Some ideas you can use include:

  • Get inspiration from outside sources.
    There’s a reason why porn websites are getting more traffic than Amazon, Twitter, and Netflix combined (Huffington Post). That reason is that porn is interesting for people to watch. It spikes up their imaginations, and many relationships can use it as a form of inspiration for future experiments.
    You can also get some ideas looking through sex shop catalogs and visiting various kink communities online.
  • Add sex to your weekly schedule.
    Sex is an activity, like any other, and you need to prepare for it in order to make it thoroughly enjoyable. In our era of instant gratification, the amounts of time and effort that good sex requires are some of the main reasons as to why the total number of times people have it is going down. Scheduling can help solve a part of this problem. When you have a night set aside specifically for this pleasurable activity, you’ll prepare for it mentally and physically. You’ll have your kids off with a babysitter or visiting some family, you’ll have some special ‘treat’ for your partner, you’ll have mentally prepared yourself for a night of prolonged enjoyment. This kind of methodical preparation might seem boring at first glance. However, humans respond well to a routine, especially if they have positive encouragement. And there is hardly any better gratification than an orgasm, as well as the precious intimacy with your beloved partner.
  • Talk it out.
    Being open about sex is essential for maintaining a happy relationship. Discussing your desires, ideas, and issues will enable you to understand your partner better. Therefore, you will be able to enjoy a more fulfilling sexual experience together.

In case nothing you do seems to work, or you feel uncomfortable either during sexual intercourse or while trying to discuss it, consider consulting a sexual therapist. Most importantly, you should never forget that every person is different. Therefore, those studies that state having sex once a week will make your relationship happiest might not apply to you, or your partner. It’s vital to put your personal needs and desires before any survey results.

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