Common Mother of the Bride Mistakes to Avoid

Your daughter is finally getting married and you couldn’t be more delighted. You may be caught up in the excitement and wedding planning. Unfortunately, weddings are stressful and it is far too easy for things to go wrong. Here is a list of common mistakes made by the mother of the bride so you know what to avoid.

  1. Whose Wedding Is It?

Perhaps you are focused on giving your daughter that perfect wedding you never had. Maybe this is your chance to relive all the fabulous memories from your own walk down the aisle. Either way, it is vital that you keep in mind that this isn’t your wedding. It can be all too easy for being helpful to cross the line into being too controlling.

If you and your husband are paying for the wedding, it is even more understandable if you try to take control. Just remind yourself that it isn’t your wedding. At the same time, if you’re paying for it, it is smart to set a clear budget that your daughter needs to adhere to unless she and the future groom are willing to pay for additional costs.

  1. Upstaging the Bride

You want to look great for the big day and in the wedding pictures. Just keep in mind that it isn’t your wedding. You don’t want to look like you think you’re the bride. Avoid wearing white clothes, a dress that has too much lace, or anything else that looks like a wedding dress. You’ll need to make sure your clothing is appropriate for the venue and time of day the wedding is being held. The bride can wear an over the top wedding dress for a mid-day wedding in the park. Even the bridesmaids can wear more formal clothing but long gowns will look out of place on other people.

  1. Outdated Style

Even though you don’t want to upstage the bride, you do want to look your best. You’ll want to find clothes and a hairstyle that looks great on you. This could be the perfect time to update your haircut, clothing, and makeup. You want to a look that is age-appropriate and modern.

This could be the perfect time to invest in real human hair wigs and hairpieces. Make sure the cut and colour are flattering to you. If you don’t normally wear a wig or hairpiece, this could be the idea time to use them to give you a photo-ready head of hair.

  1. Too Many Guests

You want to brag about your daughter’s wedding but this is her big day. The guest list should focus on your close family and her close friends. This is not the time to invite everyone you know. You’ll not only save money by keeping the wedding smaller, you’ll make the wedding and reception more fun for the bride and groom.

  1. Forgetting Comfort

Weddings and receptions can span hours. Add to that the time you’ll need to get ready before the wedding begins and posing for pictures and the wedding could be a virtual marathon. Keep this in mind when you plan your clothes, shoes, and hair for the event. You may be required to dash around making last minute adjustments of flower arrangements or hike from the parking lot to the reception venue.

Make sure your look will still look good after that time or you prepare to refresh your hair and makeup during the day. You might even want a change of clothes or shoes so that you can enjoy dancing well into the evening. Make sure you have a plan now so that you can look great and have wedding memories you’ll cherish forever.

  1. Not Preparing for Weather

No matter what time of year the wedding is held, there is plenty of potential for weather variations. This can be a huge issue if the wedding ceremony and/or the reception is scheduled to be held outdoors. It can even be a serious problem if everything will be held indoors. You’ll still have the challenge of getting to and from the venue(s) and possibly an additional location where the pictures will be staged.

For outdoor events, you might want to have a second outfit to wear so you have a great option, regardless of the weather. Even indoors, you need to be ready in case you’re seated under an air conditioning vent or the room is too hot. Have a nice wrap that will go with your dress so that you can adjust to meet the changing temperatures. Be prepared with umbrellas and even a pair of shoes you could change into. Keep supplies handy in case you need to repair your makeup, hair, or shoes at some point during the day.

  1. Forgetting You’re the Mother

It’s a celebration! That’s great but remember it isn’t your party. You should let the bride, groom, and their friends take centre stage – or centre dancefloor – during the event. This is not the time to show your wide side. Refrain from drinking too much alcohol. Your mind should remain clear so you can deal with any problems that develop and be there for your daughter.

  1. Being Too Much – Or Too Little – Of a Host

The wedding and reception aren’t about you. Refrain from calling it “our” big day or otherwise making it sound like you’re trying to be the centre of attention. The focus should always remain on the bride and groom. Skip the loud toasts, wild dancing, or the giant hat or overly bold clothes

At the same time, you need to be able to help your daughter. She’ll have plenty to keep her busy. You should be there to help greet guests, resolve problems, and make sure that everyone has a great time. Meanwhile, you don’t want it to seem like you are taking over. Your job is to help make sure things go as your daughter has planned. This is not your opportunity to make your own mark on the event, steal the limelight, or rearrange things the way you want them. Think of yourself as your daughter’s assistant and only get involved to help when she isn’t available.

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